Different Strokes

Since coming back to the UK from Doha, there are a number of things I've had to get to grips with. Some are obvious - like the weather. In the Gulf, we have around five or six days a year where rain falls. Everyone goes nuts and rushes outside, chuckling manically as they get soaked. Religious leaders even hold special prayers to call for more rain. I think it's fair to say this doesn't  happen in Britain, particularly if you're one of the unfortunates who watched their entire household drift down the high street a few weeks back.

Then there's the traffic. Drivers in the UK are a pretty genteel lot. Yes, occasionally there will be the rude cut-in or the unexpected pull-out. But on the whole, British drivers are considerate. In Doha, bad driving seems to be a matter of pride. People turning left from the right hand lane. People gaily shooting out of side roads with not so much as a glance. People parking half way round a roundabout. People parking on the roundabout. Hey, it's a handy bit of empty space, right?

But some things are taking a bit of getting used to. Here's my top three:

1. Recycling

Now, recycling is a good thing. But it just doesn't happen on a regular basis in the Gulf. You get used to chucking your bottles in with your food waste, your plastic with your cans. Someone would make a fortune if they set up a recycling company in Qatar. When I got back home, it took a good few weeks to get into the mindset. My sister, the recycling queen, went spare because I kept forgetting to separate out the rubbish. She, of course, efficiently puts everything into the correct bins. And my goodness, what a lot of bins there are. Green, blue, black, paper bin, food bin - where on earth do all these go if you don't have a back yard? But praise where praise is due - the local council does a great job.

2. Drinking

In Qatar, there are only two places to drink. In the bar of a five star hotel, or at home. An expat's most prized possession is the liquor licence. This enables them to go to the only alcohol warehouse in the country and buy enough booze to floor a battalion. Back in the UK, alcohol is readily available in corner shops, supermarkets and every high street bar. And this is a problem. Don't get me wrong - I'm a journalist. As a profession we are among the heaviest drinkers you're ever likely to meet. And yes, the bar at the Four Seasons in Doha was often full of people rather worse for wear. But I just can't get used to seeing inebriated people drinking Stella on trains, or weaving down the road chugging Bacardi Breezers, or passed out in bus shelters. It's something that never happens in Qatar because of the zero tolerance to alcohol in public. And you know what? I kind of like that.

3.Housework

Okay, I'll admit it. In Qatar, I was spoiled. I had a lovely lady called Hiwot, who lived in the house and cleaned and ironed for me and my family. Before her was Venus, and before her, Janet. All three women were paid well above the average wage for their services, we gave them days off and sick pay, and flew them home once a year for a long holiday. We taught Janet how to use a computer, Venus how to ride a bike, and Hiwot how to swim. In short, they were part of the family. It sickens me that many people in the Gulf do not treat their staff with kindness and respect. It is a matter of pride to me that Hiwot, Janet and Venus all, to this day, keep in touch and send me their news. God, I miss their ironing skills.

It has been an adjustment leaving the expat family and coming home to my real family. But the biggest adjustment is yet to come. Next time - life in self-employment.