Totally Triggered

My daughter is currently revising for her GCSEs and says she’s ‘triggered’ by the upcoming exams. This is urban slang for a negative emotional response, like fear or panic. “Don’t be daft,” I say. “Just do your best. That’s all you can do.”

Wisely, I opt not to point out that she spent five hours coming up with a revision timetable instead of actually revising. And now that very same timetable hangs, limp and unloved, on her wall, totally forgotten while she revises whatever catches her fancy. “I’m not in the mood for Russian History,” she says dolefully, sliding her book closed. To be fair, no-one’s ever in the mood for Russian History.

I remember my exams at sixteen – O Levels as they were then. I’m sure I revised for several hours a day, but when I mention that to the offspring she rolls her eyes. Apparently revising for too long is counterproductive. It’s supposedly far more efficient to do just half an hour of one subject and then move on to the next.

Half an hour? That’s not revising. That’s basically reading a couple of paragraphs and deciding it’s time for a snack. Though I suppose half an hour is an aeon of time to today’s snapchatting instagramming teenagers. Thirty minutes to them is probably the equivalent of a long weekend to us.

The one thing I’ve tried to be alert to is my daughter’s mental health. According to a Girlguiding report in the UK last year, more than two thirds of girls and young women said exams were the biggest cause of stress in their lives. Mental well-being is talked about much more openly these days and it is something we've discussed in our household. Some headteachers are concerned that tougher GCSEs are potentially damaging the mental health of our kids. Arguing about revising doesn’t make this any easier - there’s obviously a delicate balance between pushing them to do well, and pushing them too hard.

With the husband working away from home, it’s been left to me to gently encourage my daughter to revise regularly and consistently. Okay, maybe not so gently. Apparently you shouldn’t make sweeping statements like: “You’ll regret it when you open those grades in August,” or “I revised seven hours a day when I did my exams.”

But now that she’s got into her stride, I’ve been pleasantly surprised at how diligent she can be. She's working hard, and I know she's smart. I’m just trying to silence that little voice at the back of my head saying “if only she’d started sooner…”

Anyway, one way or another, it’ll all be over in a few short weeks. Then we can all relax.

Until the results in August. Gulp.