Is there a word that means to be grateful for something you
really shouldn’t have to be grateful for?
I was trying to think of it the other day, as I read about Hollywood
actor Liam Neeson. Let me explain.
The recent admission by Neeson, that he once went out
looking for a black man to murder because his friend had been raped by one,
will have shocked many. As it rightly should. To be fair, I believe he
told the story because he acknowledges the wrongness of it. But it doesn’t
deflect from the truth. A truth mirrored by the rise in race hate crime in the
UK, and the disproportionate police killings of black people in the US.
Skin colour matters.
I’ve known this from an early age. From the name-calling at
school, or being told to ‘go back where I came from’ (always a puzzler; I was
born in Leeds.) And then, when I got into journalism, to have others openly question
if I’d got the job because I ticked the right diversity boxes.
Thankfully, these instances were few and far between. By and
large, the vast majority of my life has been free of racism. Most of the people
I know judge others on their actions and personalities rather than something
as random and uncontrollable as skin colour. I’m lucky to work in a multi-cultural
environment with people from a plethora of nations. And I'm good at my job, regardless of my melanin count.
But I‘m not naïve. I know it’s an issue. And I also know
that we people of colour – especially women of colour – often have to work
harder, and be better, just to be treated the same.
So I am thankful this is one burden my daughter will not
have. Because she’s white. Looking at her, you would never know she has a
grandfather who is an Indian immigrant and a mother who is brown. Her features
are more English suburban than Asian subcontinent. She will never face racial
prejudice.
She has grown up in a multi-ethnic household. She has a rainbow heart, and an inclusive soul. She herself is colour-blind when it comes to people.
But how sad it is that I’m glad she inherited her skin tone
from her English dad, not her half-Indian mum.
And that’s why I think there should be a word, one that means being grateful for something you shouldn’t have to be grateful for. If anyone knows of it, please tell me.
